My first Birth Experience

I had my first birth in the hospital. Overall, the experience was not the worst. There were some hiccups. For example, having the nurse that did the in processing tell me ‘Honey, is this your first?’ Which to my reply, she stated, ‘you have a long run, so I suggest you relax and get the epidural’. Her statement created the atmosphere for my entire first labor experience. Followed by my pain not being taken seriously & having tons of staff in and out with little to no respect to my wishes. Hence, that the hospital at which I had by first baby was a training hospital. I wish during this time I had the knowledge of the possibility of a homebirth.

My choice of a Homebirth.

That first experience was enough for me to create a dislike for hospital care. To be more specific the labor and delivery department. From there on, I had set my mind if the only route to have babies was to go to a hospital, then I would only have 1-2 kids max. I don’t know about you, but for me that first experience marked me for the rest of my life.

My Unexpected C-section for my second birth

First and foremost, my second pregnancy was not planned at all. It was definitely a surprise! I was under birth control and still managed to get pregnant. The minute, I found out about the pregnancy, I was mentally prepared to have a second vaginal birth in a hospital setting. During that period of time, I was not aware of the possibility of a homebirth (or even the fact that doulas and midwives were a thing).

During my last trimester, my care plan took an unexpected twist. Shy of 3 weeks to my expected delivery due date, the department of the hospital where I was being taken care made the decision to shut down their labor and delivery services. Unfortunately, I had to seek a different provider and establish care outside from the hospital that I was pre-established with. Being in such a late stage of the pregnancy made finding a provider even more difficult.

The hardships

As expected, this new provider was one that the network recommended, and my options were very limited due to how soon my due date was approaching. Consequently, our interactions were rushed and very limited. When the time came, he had already set his mind to do a c-section as an option that was easier and less time consuming. He explained how I would one day thank him, for having a clean-cut incision and a faster recovery than a vaginal birth. I had nothing planned and was in shock the entire delivery. Not one family member around to help with the toddler I had at home or with my recovery.

One of the toughest times of life was the recovery of that unplanned, unpleasant c-section. I was a single parent to two small children and in mist of finals exams for my 3rd year of university. In hindsight, I had no time to sit and think about everything I had just gone through. To Include no follow up care for my physical and mental health. As a result, I was left with the scars and fear of trusting another provider ever again.

My recovery post c-section

As I came to find out, the post care and recovery was not how he described. Instead, it was filled with depression, anger, and many more other mix emotions. Instead, of focusing on the new bundle of you, I was focused on the fact that I just had an unplanned, unprepared, unwanted procedure. It took me over 6 months to be fully recover and be physically functional.

From that point on, I pledge to never again go through another birth. At the very least, another hospital labor experience. As you all know, you may make wishes, but the end result may differ in the long run. My Friends! that’s exactly what happened to me!!

When life gives you lemons you make lemonade

That’s exactly what I did when at one point, I was given a not so nice diagnosis. Then and there, I knew I wasn’t finished with having kids, that indeed I always wanted a big family. Later, I embarked on the journey on figuring out, what other options were available to me. I wasn’t sure what path my curiosity was going to take me. In brief, I did as much research as possible, and educated me on the options and advocacy of pregnancy and delivery.

My Journey discovery the possibility of having homebirths

Once, I was given the green light on my health. My amazing Doctor, whom I had 7 years under his care, pointed me towards the possibility of having a vaginal birth after my c-section and with a midwife. In addition, he was willing to continue my prenatal care along with my chosen midwifery care plan.

I did some internal/mental work to prepare myself for another pregnancy. Finally, after having my mental set and knowing that I was able to combine my pregnancy care with both providers until I was comfortable with my decision, I embarked on the journey of getting pregnant.

Best Decision Ever!

Truly, she was the one for the big task. She has over 20+years of experience in many high risks’ scenarios, to which mine fit right in. From day one, she ensured to provide me the guidance and resources that I needed to fully embrace my natural birth journey. Alongside with her team, my homebirth experience was one of a kind! I had the VBAC experience that I eagerly envisioned. Everyone around me thought I was crazy but that didn’t deter me going through my experience and choosing homebirths over hospital birth as long as mine and the baby’s health permits!