I noticed I was different early on. As a matter of fact, I was like 10 years old when I noticed my patterns in my energy levels varying around social activities. I wasn’t sure what was it exactly, because I enjoy being social. To include, my energy has tons of waves and require for me to recharge it quite often. Even more so, when it comes to trying new things. Today, as an adult that has been the hardest part for me. As a result, I’m still actively working through my social difficulties as an introvert.

Embracing herself and being happy. No matter what, lets embrace our introvert selfs!

What is an introvert?


An introvert is a person who tends to gain energy and recharge by spending time alone or in small, intimate settings. We usually have periods where we enjoy solitude. To include, deep introspection, and engaging in activities that allow us to focus and reflect internally. Also, at times prefer quieter environments. One thing that I go through quite often, is finding social interactions draining or overwhelming, particularly in large groups or for extended periods.

We are often characterized by our thoughtfulness, listening skills, and ability to delve into deep conversations. In effect, we may have a smaller circle of close friends but tend to cultivate strong and meaningful relationships. We do enjoy socializing and participating in group activities. In retrospect we also require ample time alone to recharge and restore our energy.

Girlfriends enjoy a picnic and having a good time, laughing and drinking wine.

Because of this pull of energy and need to recharge, many people will label us as not being ‘people person’. Or like in my case, being bipolar. Which refers to meaning in a friendly, confusing way, that my energy has many different wavelengths (LOL). I have come to accept that being an introvert is just part of whom I am. Once in a while, I do encounter difficulties.

Read this article and see where you land- Are you an introvert or extrovert?! I know some individuals may not classify themselves as either. By the same token, for me it has helped me tremendously to understand myself and better adapt to my environments. The social aspect of an introvert is where I see myself struggling the most. Explicitly finding that balance between recharging my energy and harboring those meaningful relationships. I tend to go out of the spectrum and hideaway in my little cove, with little to no notice.

Social Difficulties I Deal With

I think to this day my biggest difficulty as an introvert, is starting something new or going to a place by myself. In detail, is not co-dependency. As by the definition, Codependency refers to an unhealthy and dysfunctional reliance on others for self-worth, validation, and a sense of identity. In the other hand, I for some introverted reason (LOL) feel I need to have someone along with me. Simultaneously, is not necessarily to have someone at all times- just when I’m doing an activity in the outside world.

Going back to my youth, I would always have a side-quick or bring my mom to all of my activities. UGH, I hate how this sometimes, prevents me from doing things or going hard in certain aspects of my life. I must say, it has gotten better but it’s still a work in progress difficulty that I deal with.

At times I do feel like, I let myself down. Especially, when it comes to experiencing new things or just ‘going for it’. Also, it adds mental stress, because I sit back and just ponder on how different it would be if I just do it.

I recall that for my 25th birthday, I created a bucket list of social activities that I would do SOLO. LOL and yes, I accomplished the list. But is not something that I have been able to put into my daily practice. Given that I have tried to do listing of things I want to do and try going that route. In brief, it seems like I just can’t implement a daily to do list of social activities because I feel like an added pressure. I know! I know! it’s complex and weird!! Is there anyone out there like me?!!

Things I’ve done to help me ease my social difficulties

When I was younger as described above, I would have my mom join me. Shoot! Even as an adult, I would involve her somehow. If I was attending a party outside of my comfort zone, I would bring her along. She has accompanied me not only to parties but also, shopping, eating out, vacations, you name it. Too bad, so sad we no longer live close to each other and our relationship is no longer intact. So, my strategies have change throughout adulthood.

Another thing I would do when attending events, I would always wait for my friends to arrive. Only once I have confirmed their presence at the location/event, would I head towards it. But confession (LOL), there has been times, that even with the confirmation, I have arrived and turned around. Afterwards, I get upset with myself for backing down and not entering the event. And then I have to hide for weeks and even months from embarrassment with my friends. How do you explain, such situation?!

a portrait of a beautiful, happy, woman displaying a peony bouquet of flowers and her bright beautiful smile with her eyes close.

Tips and tricks to bypass that Awkwardness stage of social difficulties

The last one I recall, was a work-related networking event. As a matter of fact, I pumped myself up and was very excited to give it a try and meet my co-workers after work. Even so, I test drove to the location, to ease out my introvert social anxiety. Finally, the day arrived, and I was chill and collected. Additionally, I did my confirmation, even more to add, I had a co-worker on the phone with me for moral support. Despite it all, I did 10 circles around the facility and somehow couldn’t find accessible parking. To clarify, accessible parking to me, at least, is one that is not too far from the entrance and doesn’t take me long to find.

I know what you might be thinking… truth is I never made it inside! Eventually I stopped trying to make it to these events, instead I meet with coworkers after the events in a more intimate setting. As a result, I now attend smaller groups events and with no time commitment of who shows up and who don’t. Basically, non-formal events and or very small groups. As a matter of fact, these small groups gathering worked much better for me.

Another thing, I learned that you don’t have to apologize for saying ‘No’ to invitations. Before, I used to feel pressured to having to attend everything I was invited to. Later, I understood that things happen and is okay to simple give in a rain check or not attend all together. Even so, there are people who may not understand what it means to be an introvert and may not understand the struggles that go along with being socially awkward. So, for those, I’m learning that no explanation is needed to be given.

a happy, smiley woman holding a clear, lit up umbrella behind a beautiful sunset.

My Most current introvert social dilemma

So, you see, I’m now an adult that left my hometown about 18 years ago. Meaning that I outgrew my childhood crew and to top it off, I just moved to a new city where I know no one. Well, more so its been 3 years since the move. To include I only worked in an outside setting for maybe about 1 year before the pandemic came about. So, this remote, no social media, lifestyle has made it extremely difficult to regroup and reenter the social aspect back into society.

Let me try and explain, if you have been reading my blog you will understand the following. Despite coming out from a toxic entanglement and having to rediscovery myself, I’m starting fresh. It’s been a time of healing and finding my authentic self. During this time, I have been M.I.A. out of the web. I closed all of my accounts in order to focus on myself and my inner healing. Because of it regaining my social profile has been extremely difficult for me. It’s been hard to re-socialize and make those connections. Even more difficult, making connections to meet and socialize with.

As an adult, it becomes a tad harder to jump in and out of social circles. When you are young, it’s a tad easier because of the evolutionary stage you’re in. Usually, you are able to make connections in college, work, and even in your neighborhood. By the same token, you find people to have more similarities and connections. Adulthood is a little strange to pop up and create those connections with random people for introverts. It’s hard to find similarities or even the energy to want to explore the possibilities of making connections.

two women sitting next to a sunny bright window, looking through some papers and laughing together.

On a good note!

But not everything is hopeless. As the determined being that I’m and the fact that I’m in the middle of many new projects. Furthermore, making connections is my next big step. By comparison, I am daily making the effort to connect and rebuild new friendships. Most importantly, I have a positive outlook on those new relationships that I will create.

By the same token, I have stepped out of my comfort zone and signed up to a few networking markets events!! I know, it’s crazy!!! specially for an introvert like me! I must confess that’ I’m super excited, if you can’t tell. I’m proud of myself for having this confidence and signing up. I may not be able to grab and call/message people on a daily, but this is a great start. I think this is the step that will guide me in the right direction to making new connections.

Most definitely looking forward to this new adventure and networking. Hoping to use my hobbies as a way to reconnect with people and make new friends. Wish me luck. Lastly, if you are an introvert like me or someone that is restarting your journey from a twisted period in your life, know that regardless of the circumstances you can always restart and reconnect! Finally, know that within every twist, there is a life lesson to learn and nevertheless the twists and turns in life is what make us all such individuals.

LET”S ENJOY OUR OWN DIFFERENCE! HAPPY TRAILING IN LIFE INTROVERTS!!!